This little skit was devised for the AGS
Seminar on Ethics 15th June 2003, illustrating some “elementary”
ethical issues and principles.
Kor The
“Korzkbskian”
Pont The
“Pontificator”
(Hum, Kor and Pont are sitting around. Each player wears a hate bearing his/her
name)
(Rat enters the room, hair conspicuously messy)
Hum: G'day
Ratty. How're ya goin’, mate?
Rat: OK, Hum. And You?
Hum: Real good,
mate. Hey, I love your new hair style -
Who's your coiffeur?
Rat: (LOL) Aaaahhh - You're too kind! (Ruffles his
hair)
Actually,
I don't believe you. I appreciate your efforts
to pander to my fragile ego, but it's really not necessary.
Hum: Well, it's
just a little white lie, you know. No
harm in a little white lie, is there?
Pont: They're
evil. I never tell a lie. It's a wicked sin. You'll rot in Hell if you tell lies.
Hum: ( Guffawing
) Come on, now mate - Don't be ridiculous - How could you not sometimes tell
even a little white lie?
What
if ... um ... for example, at afternoon
tea with your aged, impoverished aunt, the plate contains a large piece of cake
and a small piece. You know she loves
that cake, and you do too. She says,
"Are you hungry, dear?".
Wouldn't
you say "Not really, Auntie", and take the small one, leaving the big
one for her?
Rat: Of course
not, that would be false - I'd say "Yes, M'am, Thank you,
Ma'am!" And I'd gobble it up.
Hum: That's
disgusting - How would you like to be old and frail and poor - And your plump
and prosperous nephew has the lion's share of the cake?
Kor: Well, I'm
a Korzybskian - and believe that accurate mapping of the territory is the most
fundamental foundation of ethical behaviour.
We cannot exercise our innate and developed time-binding skills unless
we all start by getting the facts right ..."
Hum: We'eell,
yes. But you've got to balance Fact
with Tact. I mean, you can be nice to
the old biddy without having to tell lies.
What about, when she offers you the big cake, saying something like
"Thanks, Auntie, but I don't eat a great deal of cake - I'd love to have
just this little piece." That's
not lying, it's just being economical with the Truth"
Kor: Or perhaps
it's confusing the levels of abstraction: By saying "I am hungry",
surely you would be equating yourself with hunger - Ridiculous - It's the old
"Is of Identity" trap again.
So a statement like "I am hungry isn't "The Truth", it's
all just a linguistic abstraction."
Hum: P'haps you
could continue your silly little games by calling it a "terminological
inexactitude". You're just
prolonging the agony without either satisfying the basic social courtesy
towards your Auntie, or expressing yourself usefully.
Surely
all that matters is the outcome.
Haven't you ever heard that "The End Justifies the Means"
? If you can keep your Auntie happy
that your still her adorable, polite, respectful nephew, and have some cake at
the same time, then everyone will be satisfied. She might even include you in her will. It's a small price to pay!
Pont: Eternal
damnation is not a small price! Don't
you remember Aristotle's laws of Identity:
A is A.
A
lie is a lie is a lie!
Everything is either A or not-A A statement is either a lie or not a lie!
It cannot be both A and not A A statement cannot be both a lie and not a lie!
Kor: I'm sorry,
I must butt in. We're in the
Post-Aristotelian era now. Don't you
know that:
A map is not the territory
A map covers not all the territory! And so on, etc, etc.
Hum (turning to the Korzybskian):
Tell
me, Mr Korzybskian: Your Weinbergian friend told me once:
"So
act as to make thyself a better time-binder, so act
as to enable others to use their time-binding
capabilities more effectively." :
We all believe in the Golden Rule: "Do unto
others as you would have them do unto you". But what about when telling "a little white lie" helps
you but doesn't actually harm anyone else?
How does a victimless crime impede your precious Time Binding?.
What
about , for example ...
1. You're
about to go on holidays, and your Mum says "Have you finished all your
homework?"
You
know you can do the homework when you get back.
2. Your
cricket ball's busted the window, but you tell your Mum it was you cousin who
done it.
And
he's returned to England, so it doesn't matter if she blames her!
3. You still
haven't done your Financial Reports for the Boss at work,
So you
tell her that the figures only came to you from the Accountant this afternoon
(actually last week).
4. You omit
to tell the Tax Man about your lawnmowing money
because
he collects so much money anyway, and you really earned
every
penny of it.
My learned friends here (gesturing around the room)
have lots of interesting examples from their daily lives, which I'm sure will
clarify the thorny issue of the Little White Lie - What you tink,
friends ...
ooo000ooo